Now I was going to wait to bring out this idea, but it’s clear I have to be more aggressive and bold in this campaign. Now look — I’ve already told you how I’m going to end this era of partisanship. I’ve told you how I’m going to stop the drug companies from doing whatever it is you think you hate them for. I’m going to solve global warming, neutralize hurricanes and harness their power to run our factories. But the best part is something that I haven’t mentioned yet.

And that is, as President, I will make leap year permanent, and designate it a national holiday, which will be known as “Middle-Class Day”. On this day, every year, everyone will get a paid day off from work, which they will spend watching the Everybody Loves Raymond marathon, shopping at Best Buy with their government granted gift card, and eating barbequed food cooked on their George Foreman grill.

Where will we get the extra day, you ask? We’ll just scrape together about 4 minutes from every other day. You won’t even notice they’re gone. But you’ll sure notice that great day at the end of February: watching sitcoms, buying as many as two decent-but-not-great DVDs, and eating food which has been drained of its fat by the former heavyweight champion of the world. Sounds pretty good right? Well, if you think Hillary Clinton is going to add another day to the year, you’re kidding yourself. She’s too much a part of the status quo — the partisan bickering, lobbyist influenced, solar-based calendar status quo.

Oh, and on “Middle Class Day,” you’ll still get your mail. See you there.

Courtesy of News Groper